Who we're attracted to is often very telling, especially when the allure is to someone so totally different. The attraction is to "soul qualities" we're yearning for at that time in our lives, writes Jackie Stewart in the article Why Opposites Attract. And, "On a vibrational level it is because we sense that they have a quality we need for balance. The other person has a soul quality that our soul seeks to embody more within ourselves."
When the 'vibes' are seen through the lens of astrology, you start to see trends in your friendships and love life. I know this is true in my life. There was that year of Gemini women in my life -- a roommate, colleagues, adviser. Was I learning from seeing Gemini in its many guises?
And then there's the drive to balance the masculine/feminine. Writes Jackie, "When someone (and it can be a man or woman) carries a lot of male energy (driven, active, logical and initiating) they will often seek the counterpart to that in their partner. So they will be drawn to someone who carries a lot of female energy (creative, intuitive, nurturing and sharing)."
And vice versa, as I experienced with someone I fell in love with, that had a lot of forceful, creative fire energy. This happened at my Saturn return, with Saturn in cardinal fire Aries. It was brutal, I have to say, mainly because I had no context for it -- like astrology! The energies we're drawn to, like particular elements, show us what's up -- what teachings in relationship are bringing more wholeness now?
I find another guide is jealousy. If I'm jealous of someone's life, or who they are, I see if I can't isolate what it is that's the main draw. That's a big message about what I want in my own life. What trends have you experienced in friendships or love?
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Libran men are my catnip, it seems. It makes sense when you consider that my Moon (which is in mutual reception with my Venus), Juno, and Ceres are all in my Libran 7th house.
I didn’t realize until just now, when I looked at the charts of my closest friendships as well as romantic relationships, that ALL of them have been with people who have Cardinal signs as either their Sun, Moon, or ASC. My guess is that this shared mode acts as a common ground upon which I build relationships.
That’s interesting Mari. I realized awhile after I was married that his Mars Leo was very familiar – my Dad had that Mars too. I’ve always liked the proud, man’s man type. And my Venus is Leo conjunct. Great to hear from you.
All of my major relationships in the last few years have strong Chiron and Pluto linkages. (I have Chiron-Lilith conjunct in the 7th house., and progressed Venus to Pluto in Scorpio) Current beau and I have Chiron-NN conjunct in the 8th house and Pluto conjunct Scorpio ascendant. Previous one had his Chiron conjunct my desc (mega wounding in this relationship) and prior to that had a 3 and half year relationship with someone who’s Venus-Chiron conjunction formed a grand trine with my Venus-Moon. Once Venus progressed to Pluto this relationship disintegrated though as I went seeking intensity!
I have a strong feeling that I’m going to marry the person that I’m with at the moment and our Suns (Leo-Capricorn) and Moons (Aquarius -Cancer) are inconjunct each other which I think it’s pretty interesting – covers all the elements
. Truly opposite. Lots of aspects between planets to make up for these fundamental differences(eg his Mars conjunct my Venus is Libra, his Venus-Mercury conjunction to my Moon-Mercury opposition, and more) and his Saturn hits my south node in Libra (I met him at the tail end of his Saturn return). He is SO DIFFERENT to anyone else I have ever been with – not my usual type at all. A LOT of our communication is non-verbal as well. I’m enjoying the dynamic at the moment. Hopefully overall we don’t end up being tooooo different 
I seem to be surrounded by a lot of fire signs, especially Leo people or people with leo rising.
I’m not entirely sure why though.
The dominant element in my chart is water.
In equal house/Koch I have a 4 planet stellium in my 5th house.
So maybe that’s it. I also have Saturn in Leo, so maybe it’s a karmic thing.
I’m a scorpio sun sign.