On June 12 1994, It wasn’t his actual biological mother doing the abandoning. But it might as well have been - because the energy released in killing his ex-wife was nuclear - all the times in his life he felt betrayed and abandoned by women finally reached the surface and came out in one blinding act of violence. This was the release of all that dark material, all that with repressed emotional material that was taking over the entire psyche. Interestingly, the events of that day were small, but significant contributors to his breakdown.
Every incident that day was a rejection of O.J.: Nicole excluded him from a family party that was held after their daughter’s dance recital; his girlfriend Paula Barbieri was angry that O.J. didn’t let her go with him to the recital, so she flew off to Las Vegas to be with the singer Michael Bolton. He then called a whole list of women to go with him to this event, and all of them turned him down.
He also lost a golf game that day. Perhaps, this too, might have felt like a failed attempt at being a man? His attempt to control and be a guy failed with the women in his life, and then he loses a golf game. In a metaphoric sense, it was tantamount to not being able to "get it up." You gotta wonder if any or all of that were the triggers to his finally losing it.
This, to most people, would have just looked like a bad day, but to O.J. Simpson, it was tantamount to a final rejection from all women in his life. Remember also, that he was being treated for depression and was taking Prozac. The thing he feared the most - abandonment - finally happened in his mind, and was probably exacerbated by the Prozac. I believe his mind finally snapped, and it lost all control - a full mental and emotional breakdown. For a few intense moments, O.J.’s past feelings of powerlessness and impotency came to the surface and the anger was released in one powerful volcanic incident. O.J. had finally realized that Nicole wasn’t going to come back to him. This was existential rage - the rage of the soul - that had been building his entire life.
Every wound he inflicted on Nicole was a wound being delivered to his mother, and to women in general. The shattering of his own mythic system had finally happened (and was frankly necessary), but the cost of that release was devastating; if O.J. had been conscious enough to figure out the root causes of his behaviors, this whole event could have been avoided.
(As an interesting plot twist, Ron Goldman was also a Cancer. There are a few key connections between Goldman’s and O.J.’s chart. Given in the metaphysical world there are no accidents, I am going out on a limb and saying here, that somewhere, in OJ’s unconscious mind, Goldman registered on his radar screen as his father; and killing both Nicole and Ron was really the act of killing both his parents. The abandonment he felt from his father, was real, I have no doubt).
Ron Goldman and his family actually represent the lost father (Saturn/Pluto) image - forcing O.J. to be accountable for his actions, and to pay for what he has done, in the monetary sense. The civil suit brought by the Goldman family has been all but for naught: Simpson hasn’t paid much, (about $408,000), of the $33.5 million owed to the Goldmans. At this point, this debt increases by $10,000 per day.
